Discovery

A Fake Life: The Story of an Affair

When your spouse is involved in an affair, you ruminate about the relationship between them. You can lose yourself in those thoughts, your mind wandering down roads that do not even exist.

Remember, everything looks better from the outside view, especially on social media. 

When a relationship begins as an affair, it is immediately off to a bad start. Nothing good comes from deception and that is exactly what an affair is. Deception for all involved, the betrayed, the betrayer, and the affair partner, being lied to and lying to themselves. Yes, I included the betrayed in that, we too do our share of lying to ourselves during this situation.

The Cheater and their affair partner may think that they have found the love of their life, but it is just two broken people using each other to hide from themselves. 

A Fake Life.

A road to self-destruction and they will see it once the limerence wears off. Hopefully, before it is too late to get out of it, as some people do try to continue a relationship after the affair is exposed. It is common for affair partners to try and legitimize their relationship by staying together to ease themselves from the shame of how they began their relationship and all the damage that they caused in doing so.

I had the opportunity to interview someone who was involved in an affair relationship, someone who did leave their spouse, and try to legitimize that relationship. They said that it never felt right and that there was no trust. Feelings that had started as a fantasy, immediately ended once the rose-colored glasses of the affair limerence wore off.  They were left with nothing but regret, a sense of “what did I just do to my life?” The person that they declared their love to no longer looked attractive as their AP’s true form showed. They saw that the affair partner was also broken and very selfish, and realized that the AP’s personality traits, values, and goals in life were not in line with their true-life purpose. They realized that they were just using the AP relationship as an escape from inner child issues.  They were lucky, as they were able to wake themselves up from the limerence and reunite with their spouse before they permanently blew up their life.  They describe it as a “road to self-destruction” and stepping outside of who they were and wanted to be.

That is just one person’s experience, but studies show that the stats of those relationships continuing long-term are about 1-2%, not very good odds.

Listening to the view of someone who once wore the cheater shoes and came to realize, heal, and reunite with their partner can be helpful. I suggest checking out this TikTok creator,

Rese had an affair, woke up, did the work, and reunited with her husband, she now shares her story and helps the betrayed to understand and the cheater to wake up and stop this self-destructive behavior.

Check her out on TIK TOK.

With YOUR Success in Mind,

NOMI


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